


but darling, you are the only exception

by pocketfullofdaisies



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: 1 room 2 kids, Alternate Universe - Lawyers, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Road Trip, And Ben will give her the Hugs, And when they fall they will fall hard OKAY?, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Awkward publicly but comfortable personally, Ben Solo does not understand privacy, Ben is 35 Rey is 25, But I promise you it's for character arc, But he's secretly a romance himbo, Canon Compliant Age Difference, Death of non-major canon character in Sequel Trilogy, Devoted Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Dirty Talk, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Sex, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fake threats of violence because they are bickering idiots, Falling In Love, Family Issues, Happily Reylo Ever After 💙, I knew I loved you before I met you vibes, Just lots of awkward moments, Kylo won't put on a shirt Kylo is kind of a flirt, Let's hope they don't get cabin fever, Light Angst, Making Love, Minor grief over loss, Not Beta Read, Older Man/Younger Woman, Or more like Ben's got Uncle issues, Or personal boundaries, Or personal space, Praise Kink, Protective Ben Solo, Protective Kylo Ren, Rey Needs A Hug, Rey has fear of rejection and abandonment issues, Sexual Tension, Size Difference, Size Kink, Skywalker Family Drama (Star Wars), Skywalker Family Feels (Star Wars), Slap Slap Kiss, This fic is the writer's love letter to Bring Ben Solo home, This is fiction so IRL do not share with a stranger please, Unhappy Childhood, Vacationing just thousands of miles away, yes plural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:20:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26637979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pocketfullofdaisies/pseuds/pocketfullofdaisies
Summary: “You are, of course, welcome to share my cabin and bed, but I am not moving to a twin—” and he adds with an obvious contemptuous tone, “—sorry.”Entitled little prick, she thinks as he continues to read. He’s not fucking sorry at all. Her mind is a flurry turbulence of emotions. Not only is she outraged by this fuck-up and his blatant self-righteous behaviour, but she’s also becoming increasingly flustered by how casually he’s just invited her to sleep in the same bed as him.A complete stranger.When Rey’s vacation booking gets messed up, she’s forced to share her train cabin (and bed) with another traveller called Ben Solo, who strangely makes her both pissed and horny at the same time.
Relationships: Finn & Rose Tico, Finn/Rose Tico, Kylo Ren & Rey, Kylo Ren/Rey, Kylo Ren/Rey/Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Kylo Ren/Ben Solo
Comments: 126
Kudos: 557





	but darling, you are the only exception

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fettuccine_alfreylo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fettuccine_alfreylo/gifts), [nightsofreylo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightsofreylo/gifts), [Reylooftroy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reylooftroy/gifts).



> This work is specially for these three who are such sweet and gentle souls in this fandom. I also JUST realised all their usernames have ‘Reylo’ in them. Those who haven’t yet, support their AO3 work or follow them on Twitter for funny wholesome goodness! 💙
> 
> \---
> 
> Happy autumn/fall to those in the Northern Hemisphere! 🍁 🍂
> 
> I need a break from doing dark, strong-themed and very angsty fics for a second, so I’m attempting this vacation fluff with light angst (yes, I wouldn’t be me without some angst) one-shot to cleanse my mind, body and soul during this pandemic. All my fics currently deal with a darker, more tortured Kylo Ren/Ben Solo in-line with canon, so I kinda wanted to explore something in between, so there’s still some Byronic elements here.
> 
> This is inspired by two of my favourite rom-com films; The Proposal (2009) and The Holiday (2006) so I’ll have some easter eggs and homages to scenes.
> 
> PS: Also, I have minimal knowledge of how law firms **actually work** so do go easy on me hehe 💙 
> 
> **WARNINGS:** I’ve got some generally all-encompassing tags, but there will be some specific description/references to death at childbirth, a canon-character’s untimely demise (not a major character, but this person is somewhat important to the mains) and some conversations around family fights, struggles during childhood and bullying. Hence, the Light Angst tag.
> 
> Stay happy, healthy, safe. Be kind and excellent to each other. Tell your friends, family and social moots you love them.  
> Enjoy 💕 
> 
> Title of this fic: [The Only Exception by Paramore](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-J7J_IWUhls)  
> Header Artpiece by the brilliant [@alantieislander](http://twitter.com/alantieislander)

* * *

Rey Ridley’s got three weeks of break before she begins working for a new firm.

She’s already made a list of things she’d like to do until then— _everything_ that includes from buying a bunch of new work outfits to getting piss drunk with her foster brother to celebrate her new dream job. And just when she figures things weren’t going to get any better, she gets a notification in her inbox that she’s just won a ticket for a cross-country train journey in some outrageous sweepstake from her favourite travel magazine.

And Rey _never_ goes anywhere, but yet something tells her this is worth it. Significant _enough_ to shell out some of her hard-earned-cash and take a leap off the ledge.

She even remembers the conversation she had with Finn at the airport before she boarded her plane.

“I still think you’re crazy. You’re travelling almost five-thousand miles away when you rarely go further than the gas station at the intersection just outside of—”

“ _Okay_ —” Rey snorts. “I get it, but it’s not my fault you can’t come with!”

“And have to pay for all that shit while you ride the entire way for free? No fucking way,” and Finn sticks his tongue out. “Besides, these kinda luxury trips where you’re stuck indoors while drinking and eating are usually for the older folks, isn’t it?”

“Whatever. It’s free so I’m not gonna complain. Plus, it’s not an _all_ -expense paid deal. Had to settle flights and some of the smaller stuff.”

“Yeah, it’s still a nope from me!” he laughs before pulling her into an affectionate farewell hug. “Take care of yourself, peanut. Update me every day, stay hydrated, and for the love of God, _don’t_ unnecessarily talk to strangers.”

Finn doesn’t know it, but something’s woken inside her, calling to her, telling her that there’s something else out there just waiting for her.

She doesn’t know what it is, but she feels ready to find out.

* * *

**DAY 1**

Rey is a light traveller, having only one sling bag and a tiny suitcase on wheels. The plan is simple—a four-day scenic train voyage with a couple of hours to catch some city sights if possible, and then she’ll head to the airport to catch the first flight back home.

The weather is scorching hot when she exits the cab, already cursing herself for not packing more shorts and tees as she slips on her oversized sunnies, dragging her bag across the station platform to locate her train. She presents the digital ticket on her phone to the attendant standing outside who happily shows her to the designated cabin—

> **PLATINUM SERVICE**
> 
> _Spacious double bed cabin_
> 
> _En suite equipped with shower, vanity, cabinet space and bathroom amenities_
> 
> _All meals included_
> 
> _In-room dining available upon request_

Who cares if Finn’s right about the travelling crowd being way past her age group?

She’s looking forward for some relaxation, bumming around in her cabin and experiencing the local culture and cuisine. Doesn’t bother her one bit about vacationing solo, because there’s no company she’ll enjoy more than her own.

This is going to be the perfect trip.

Just perfect.

***

There _must_ be a mistake.

After the attendant opens the cabin door, there’s already someone inside; an unusually tall individual with a book in hand, sitting atop the two ottomans with his feet stretched across the coffee table.

His eyes shift up. “Yes?”

Rey’s skin prickles at how gloriously rich and masculine his voice is, and from his accent, he’s likely her fellow countryman too. 

“Err, my sincerest apologies, sir—” and the attendant frantically looks at his scanning device, squinting at Rey’s cabin details again. “Seems like there’s been a mix-up.”

Rey’s eyes widen. “Not from my end, I hope?”

“One second, Miss. Allow me to check this with my supervisor.”

When the attendant scrambles away, Rey awkwardly stands just outside the door. Her pulse flutters when she sees the man inside the cabin staring at her. She gives him a faint smile and he instantly appears to be startled by this, hastily returning to his novel.

She takes this opportunity to check him out. He’s not bad looking, much older surely, and she speculates it’s not obscenely beyond her range. He’s got a head full of gorgeous dark hair that aptly frames the right points of his face, not to mention a rather pensive disposition and some _really_ nice lips.

 _Mmhh_ , she ponders. _Cute moles._

The attendant finally comes back with someone else, and Rey spies the details on the woman’s tag.

> **JANNAH CALRISSIAN**
> 
> _Customer Service Manager_

“Thank you, Dopheld,” Jannah nods. “I’ll take it from here.” After ushering Rey inside the cabin, she throws them a large, friendly grin. “Hello there, folks. I’m Jannah, one of the train’s managers on this service for the next four days. How you both doing today?”

“Fine, thank you,” Rey carefully answers, feeling more anxious now.

“What’s the problem here?” the man’s response is terse, unmistakeably annoyed by a sudden, unwanted crowd in his cabin.

“My apologies, Mister Solo. Seems there’s been an error in our system which inadvertently double-booked this cabin. Miss Ridley’s details were somehow overlooked, leading her to be erroneously registered to this room as well.”

“What?” Solo retorts. “How? I’ve had my booking confirmed almost a year ago.”

“Unfortunately, this oversight was mainly due to the nature of Miss Ridley’s ticket which was allocated as part of a competition our company sponsored, and we—”

“ _Competition_?” Solo sneers in disbelief.

And Rey’s throat drops to her stomach.

“Yes, but it’s truly our error. We can only apologize for the inconvenience this has caused. I’ve checked our passenger manifest and regret to note we have no more available rooms. My team is currently reaching out to passengers who are staying in cabins with twin beds to see if we can potentially arrange a—”

“No,” Solo cuts her off. “I specifically requested a double bed for _my_ own comfort. I’m not taking a downgrade.”

Jannah looks a little uneasy. “I—uh, I fully understand your frustration.” And she turns apologetically to Rey. “I can’t stress how terribly sorry we are for this. I assure you that our company will provide _full_ compensation, should you choose not to continue this journey with us.”

Before Rey replies, Jannah’s phone rings—

“Excuse me for a moment. I’ll just need to check with my team on the preparations. Will be back in a few, but do let me know what you’d like to do, Miss Ridley, and I will personally ensure a smooth transition for you.” 

After Jannah leaves, Rey frowns at him. “This would be a lot easier if you’d be more cooperative so we can sort this—”

“This isn’t rocket science. Given I _paid_ for mine, and yours is just a silly _freebie_ , isn’t it obvious who should take any form of downgrade?”

Rey’s mouth falls open. 

His eyes narrow at her flabbergasted expression, and there’s a fleeting hint of empathy before it retreats behind an idle shrug. “You are, of course, welcome to share my cabin and bed, but I am not moving to a twin—” and he adds with an obvious contemptuous tone, “— _sorry_.”

 _Entitled little prick_ , she thinks as he continues to read. He’s not fucking sorry at all. Her mind is a flurry turbulence of emotions. Not only is she outraged by this fuck-up and his blatant self-righteous behaviour, but she’s also becoming increasingly flustered by how casually he’s just invited her to sleep in the same bed as him.

 _Him_.

A complete stranger.

It’s just a giant red flag in her face, and all reasonable logic tells her to fuck the trip and just get this incompetent company to provide her free accommodation for the entire duration of her holiday. There won't be another train service like this till next week, so that's going to mess up her flights. It doesn’t have to be a complete disaster; she’ll happily improvise her itinerary and make the best out of it. And what if he’s actually some creepy weirdo who may or may not become inappropriate with her? He’s more than _twice_ her size, so he’ll easily overpower her if he decides to—

But yet, this voyage is supposed to be the highlight of her trip, and she’s been _so_ looking forward to it. She does have a tiny pair of grooming scissors which could potentially be a self-defence weapon, if it really came down to that.

There’s a knock on the door and Jannah steps back in. “Sorry about that!” she cheerfully says before addressing Rey again, “I don’t mean to rush you, Miss Ridley, but unfortunately we are due for departure in twenty minutes.”

Rey’s gaze flicks to Solo again, her heart skipping a beat upon seeing him haughtily glancing back at her.

***

Shortly after the train pulls away from the platform, it doesn't take them long to burst into another feud. 

“Don’t just throw your suitcase _there_ ,” he quips. “They’ve given you an adequate closet in the corner where you’re supposed to—”

“Are you serious?” she grumbles.

“Could you _not_ dump your toiletries all over the sink? There’s a glass for you to place—”

“Leave me alone!”

He huffs, “I like to keep my abode _tidy_ , thank you very much. It’d be great if you’d stop trying to destroy the tranquillity of this space by flinging things everywhere.”

“ _Your_ abode?”

“Are you under the pretence that it’s _not_?”

She glares in astonishment. “Why, you smug—”

He shakes his head. “Hey, nobody _forced_ you to stay here with me. Honestly, I felt sorry for you, so my offer was foolishly out of impulse. Something I’m beginning to regret. And after such a massive fuck-up from their end, you could’ve easily bullied your way into getting their customer service to recompense you with a nice hotel and an alternative tour program.”

She’s seeing red now. “You—you’re such a—”

“Uh-huh. Go on, say it.”

“Dick!”

He barks out a laughter. “Aww, that’s cute. I’m crying on the inside.” 

“You’re a fucking idiot!”

“News flash—you’re _not_ the centre of the universe, so do us both a favour and try to be more cooperative like you’ve so appropriately requested from me earlier.”

“Why can’t you be a gentleman?”

He rolls his eyes. “Oh, why hello, Mom. Is that you inside there?”

“Quit making fun of me like I’m a bloody child!”

“That’s gonna be a challenge given you’re acting like one.”

“Fuck off!”

He arches an eyebrow at her, mildly shaking his head. 

She continues to glower at him, her teeth slightly bared. “And just so there’s no dumb misunderstanding, if you touch me, or make _any_ kind of move on me, I’ll cut your throat in your sleep.”

“ _Jesus_ —” Solo scoffs, his lips curled in clear disgust. “Don’t you worry, sweetheart. If I’ve become so desperate that the standard of girls I hit on fall _that_ far off the reservation, I’d slit my own throat too.”

She’s on the verge of wanting to claw his eyes out, silently wondering if she’s equally made a mistake in agreeing to stay with this imbecile, but deep down, she knew he wasn’t going to be a walk in the park. And _yet_ , she made the decision to ignore it when she lost the argument with herself that she should have just disembarked back at the station. 

She sighs and says nothing further.

* * *

Rey takes every opportunity to wander around the entire train. _Any_ excuse to be away from the cabin where she’ll have to endure him. She orders a coffee at the main lounge, connecting her phone to the WiFi to check her messages before plugging in her earphones to make a call to Finn.

When his face pops up on the screen, she doesn’t waste a second.

“—not my fault that they fucked-up, but he looks at me like I owe him my whole life!”

“—nosy bastard when he tells me how to keep a toothbrush. _My_ toothbrush!”

Finn chuckles. “You’re really something, babe. I told you to avoid strangers, but you’ve gone a million steps ahead to share a room with one instead.”

“You think I want _this_?”

He grins. “You tell me.”

“You little shit!”

“Love you too, peanut.”

“Can’t you see I’m miserable?” she whines. 

“Well, what can you do? Seems like a concerned fella to be offering you a place to stay. You’re in this now. Just try to make the best of it for the next four days. Set the ground rules and be _very_ clear about it.” He shifts to look slightly more serious. “Do you have something to use as a—”

“Yes, yes. I have my nasal hair trimmer for strays.”

“Right. That tiny… _thing_.” Finn scratches his chin. “It’s better than nothing, but what’s your gut feeling about this guy? Is he a creep or can he be trusted?”

“A creep? Not in a dangerous way, I guess.” And she wrinkles her nose. “Can he be trusted? Probably, given his head’s shoved too far up his ass to see anything beyond himself.”

She giggles when Finn expels out his soda through the nostrils.

* * *

Rey’s standing outside the cabin door when she checks her watch.

> **22:15**

What’s the chances of him already asleep? Or perhaps he’s having a drink somewhere else and she’ll be able to enjoy some privacy for a few, short minutes. That idea itself churns a euphoric sensation throughout her nerves, and she speedily opens the door, ready to jump into the bathroom for a hot shower—

—only to see that the evening service has been completed. The table surfaces around the room have folded away, both ottomans expanded, the double bed made-up with Solo stretched out atop the mattress in a comfortable pair of black sweatpants while browsing on his phone.

And he’s got no shirt on.

Topless. He’s fucking _topless_.

Rey’s lips part wordlessly, paralysed in horror as she stares at him, unable to prevent her eyes from tracing along his very defined abdomen, gloriously chiselled pectorals and tree-trunk sized biceps. The fact that the lights appear to glow off his pale skin only serves to reiterate the ridiculous possibility that he’s been carved from a damn block of marble.

When he turns to her, she averts her gaze to her feet instead. “Do—do you have something—a fucking tee, or something you can put on?”

Silence.

She nervously looks back at him, and a mixture between confusion and heat coils inside her when she takes in his unabashed expression. She knows she’s becoming red, because she _feels_ the warmth pooling in her cheeks, so when he refuses to budge, she hastily faces the wall.

“What’s the _big_ deal,” he grumbles. “Never seen a chest before?”

“I—I know it’s just a…” and she takes a deep breath. “Look, could you just cover that up?”

“It’s almost thirty fucking degrees!” 

“ _Please_?”

He sighs, but she’s thoroughly relieved when she soon hears the rustling sounds of fabric. 

“Where were you during dinner?” he asks her, his voice muffled as he pulls a plain tee over his shoulders.

“Eating at the restaurant?”

“You _do_ know Platinum passengers have a separate dining car from everyone else, right?” And he clears his throat. “It’s safe now. No more scary, naked men around.”

 _Condescending motherfucker_ , she swears.

“I…I knew that!” she huffs as she rummages through her belongings. “Besides, how’d you know I didn’t just sit somewhere else?” but when she looks up, her heart skips a beat when he gives her an underwear-dropping smirk.

“ _Because_ —since we share a cabin, you’d be required to eat with me. At the same table.” He tilts his head. “And I happen to know you _didn’t_ go, because I was there till the end of dinner service.”

She shakes her head. “You just _love_ having the last say, don’t you?”

“Yep.”

“Well, I wanna take a shower, so do you mind leaving for a bit?”

“Can’t you just bring everything into the bathroom with you?”

“I’d feel more comfortable if you weren’t around. I’ll be really quick. Like fifteen minutes tops.”

Solo raises his hands. “Fine, whatever. I was gonna go get a nightcap anyway.” He pauses with his palm on the door handle. “You want anything?”

 _Oh._ “Um, no. I’m good, thank you.” 

***

She peeks out from the doorway, cursing under her breath when she sees that he’s already back inside. She looks down at her outfit, and she’s never loathed herself more for being so thoughtless in her choice of outfits—

But hey, she was supposed to be on her own in the first place!

“Could you shut your eyes?”

“You’re kidding, right?” he groans.

She waits for a few seconds. “Are—are they closed yet?”

“I’m not gonna look, Rey.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

She has a swift intake of breath, calming herself before tiptoeing out with her clothes bundled in her arms. She crouches over her suitcase, clumsily ramming everything inside before attempting to climb onto her side of the bed—

But she freezes like a deer caught in headlights when she catches him staring at her in amusement, his obsidian eyes sweeping over her navy pair of satin camisole and shorts.

“ _Those_ are your everyday pyjamas?”

She scrambles under the covers and turns her back on him. “You said you _wouldn’t_ look!”

“Uh-huh.”

“And I was supposed to be travelling _alone_ on this trip!”

“Sure.”

She breathes into her pillow, attempting to snuggle into a comfortable position while keeping enough distance from his significantly imposing body which already takes up more than half the bed. After switching off her bedside lamp, her mind suddenly clicks.

“How’d you know my name?” 

“Considering your shit’s still everywhere, including your passport and an effectively oversized bag tag with some awful handwriting that spells—”

“Goodnight, Mister Solo!” she snaps.

The bed is fantastic, the pillows feeling insanely lush and fluffy. It smells great too, a freshness with a hint of spice, and she wonders if the attendants spray fragrance on the sheets during the setting up routine. She yawns, realising how exhausted she actually is from the travelling.

“It’s Ben.”

“Hmm?”

“You can call me _Ben_.”

She’s already mumbling drowsily, “…okay.”

“Goodnight, Rey.”

“Goodnight, Ben Solo…” 

* * *

**DAY 2**

When she wakes up the next morning, Ben’s not there.

There’s a tray with her share of the continental breakfast placed on his side of the bed that’s already neatly made.

After washing up and changing into her clothes for the day, she places her hands on her hips, eyeing the slight mess in her corner of the room. _Fine_ , she pouts. _Do it as a peace offering._ She prowls around, snatching up every bits and pieces of her possessions that she can find, but not before accidentally tripping over Ben’s duffle bag near the foot of the bed, leading to some items hurling out from the side zip he’s left open.

“Damn it!” she exclaims.

She picks up some pens, a packet of mints and a flat metal casing that’s unfortunately come undone. When she flips it over, she notices a stack of business cards within, and before she can look away, her sights catch a glimpse of the sophisticated printing.

> **BENJAMIN SOLO**
> 
> _Senior Partner_
> 
> Palpatine Dooku & Snoke LLP

“Well, fuck me…” she mutters.

She’s now learning additional things about him; he’s a grumpy dark lord, he’s got no fucking sense of personal space, he’s physically intrusive, he’s frustratingly attractive, he shares the same profession as her and he’s holding a major position at one of the largest law firms in the country—dreadfully notorious for their aggressive and intimidating corporate defence attorneys.

And he’s most probably—very _likely_ , at least a decade older than her.

***

She finds him sitting in the lounge with coffee and a new book.

“Morning,” she greets him politely.

“Hey,” he says. “Sleep well?”

“Well enough, I suppose. Thanks for not—” and she lowers her voice, “—being weird and doing anything that could…well, inappropriately offend me.”

“I’m _always_ offending people, though. No matter what I do. I just wouldn’t be me if I didn’t piss someone off.”

She blinks at him and he grins. Now that she’s getting another chance to look at him properly, he’s actually rather handsome—in a brooding sort of way, and his height and broad frame unquestionably adds to his overall charm.

“Coffee?” he interrupts her daydream.

“Ah yes, but I was just thinking of ordering mine to go, so—”

“You don’t have to sit with me if you don’t want to, Rey. I’m an adult. You’re not gonna hurt my feelings.” 

“Oh, nothing like that, I just…” but he’s already turned back to his novel. She bites her lip, knowing she’s probably going to regret this later as she settles on the opposite chair. After being served the coffee, she glances back to him. “Uh, I finished the chocolates in the room. You don’t mind, do you?”

He doesn’t look up. “I don’t snack on junk, so knock yourself out.”

“Okay…so, what are you reading?”

“A bunch of stuff that I haven’t had time to catch-up on.”

She peers at the cover. “You’re reading John Grisham?”

“Rereading some of his older writings, actually.”

“Wow, you’re like a walking cliché.”

That catches his attention. “Excuse me? What’s that supposed to mean?” 

Rey knows she’s terrible at lying, so the jig’s pretty much up. “I—err…might’ve unintentionally found your business cards.”

He quirks an eyebrow. “You went through my stuff?”

She waves her hands. “No, no, it’s not what you’re thinking. I was trying to clean, and your stupid duffle got in the way!”

He finally puts his book down, shaking his head. “Forget it, I don’t wanna know what else you saw. I’ve nothing of interest anyway.”

She drinks her coffee uncomfortably for a few moments, vaguely aware he’s just looking at her.

“Do you read?” he suddenly asks.

“Yes, admittedly not as much as I used to, but I was genuinely into literature back in high school.” 

“And who made you fall in love with literature? Austen, Shelley or Bronte?”

“Oh, that’s easy. The Bronte sisters.”

“Why them?”

She shrugs. “Because I’ve always preferred my romantic partners to have that sense of vulnerability, and maybe a little darker with a slightly chaotic nature.” She coughs awkwardly, realising how strange that sounds. “I mean—they make far more compelling characters in storytelling.”

Ben props a knuckle under his chin. “That’s surprisingly very enlightening. I'd imagine chaos and you pretty much go hand in hand.” 

“Listen here, Ben Solo—” and she furrows her eyebrows. “I know you’re a real hot-shot guy back home, and you probably think I’m just some basic idiot, but I’m really not. In fact, I’m just about to start a new job after this break—my ultimate _dream_ job, mind you—in one of the most respected practices for international law and human rights.” 

“Is that so?”

“Yes.”

He snickers. “Well, I happen to have connections with most of the prestigious firms, and I’m curious to know which of them gets so generously involved in charity when they look for new hires.”

“ _You_ —you’re such a big-headed—”

“So, which one is it? Holdo and Ackbar? Dameron Wexley and Xiono?”

“Skywalker Kenobi and Organa, you smartass!”

Almost abruptly, his jaw seems to clench while his fingers drum atop the table. When his gaze sears into hers, she’s instantly perplexed by this sudden rigidness from him, wondering if she’s said something far more offensive than she anticipated. Did he have an all-out warfare in the courtroom with them before? Surely not, given they’ll rarely cross-paths when his clientele is mostly billion-dollar corporations.

His voice is lower now. “I assume you’re an associate, so who’s taken you under their wing?”

She frowns. “Luke Skywalker. He was my interviewer.”

Ben’s lips press together into a firm line, languidly nodding. Another short silence falls between them before his sights seem to concentrate on his coffee cup instead. “Have you been introduced to the other partner? She’s—”

“Leia Organa?” Rey perks up. “Not yet, but she’s been my fucking idol ever since law school. I think I’ve read _every_ single one of her published papers— _all_ brilliant of course. She must’ve managed hundreds of human rights cases by now, and she’s incredibly passionate about ensuring refugees and asylum seekers have impartial treatment in our legal system, regardless of their background. Did you know she created a special division in the company to do _only_ pro bono cases so they can reach a wider segment of society?”

His corner of his mouth lifts a little. “Yes, she is unparalleled.” 

Her lips part in excitement. “You know her?”

There's a slight hesitation before he nods again.

She babbles on. “ _Oh_ , what am I saying. Of course you do. She’s a real powerhouse. And did you know Luke and Leia are biological siblings? Well, twins actually that were somehow separated at birth due to some ridiculous adoption bungle, but I honestly don’t see any resemblance. Did you also know the entire company was founded and built from their family fundamentals? They’re so incredibly inspirational and I’m just overwhelmed that they—” and Rey pauses to take a breath. “That they turned out to be so warm and accessible, despite being such icons in the industry.” 

And her pulse races when Ben gives her a tiny smile.

She exhales sheepishly. “I’m sorry, I know my mouth’s just unnecessarily going off, but honestly I’m scared shitless as well.”

“Why is that?”

“I dunno. After my interview, some associates in the elevator asked me if I was applying for the position under Luke. When I said yes, they told me the last person who worked under him was a certified genius, and no one’s been able to live up to Luke’s expectations since.” Rey shrugs absentmindedly. “Not sure what went down between them, but can’t have been anything good if it took Luke five bloody years before he agreed to take another again. I’m guessing I’ve got some _pretty_ big shoes to fill.”

Ben clasps a palm over his mouth, proceeding to give her a long, appraising look, and she’s starting to feel a little self-conscious under his attentions. She’s _also_ internally screaming when she gauges how large his hands are.

Ugh. Why the fuck is he so rudely huge all over?

Finally, he speaks again, “You’ll be fine, Rey. You’ll do an equally great job as your predecessor, if not better.”

“Aww—you’re getting soft, Solo!” she teases. “Why you being so nice to me all of a sudden?”

He rolls his eyes. “ _Anyway_ , I’m sure you’re exactly what they’ve been looking for. And try to give Skywalker a chance. He can get a little stuck in his outdated ways on most days, but the old man means well.” He proceeds to give her an oddly poignant look. “You might not get it at first, but eventually you will.”

“Ah, and you know this… _how_?” 

He’s quiet for a moment. “I’ve worked with him some years ago, and if our little vacation meet-cute should tell you anything, our law community is evidently a rather… _small_ one.”

* * *

One of the stops for the day includes a picture spot; a breathtaking cliffside view of heavily forested mountains that will have snow-capped peaks during the winter season, and given Rey grew up in an arid region where its landscapes consist mostly of rose-coloured deserts and rugged rocks, this is fast becoming the most beautiful place she’s ever seen.

She snaps a couple of photos and sends them to Finn.

“Boyfriend?”

Rey gasps as she stumbles forward, the phone flying out of her hand, but it’s skilfully caught by a giant palm before it hits the ground. She’s immediately yells, “You could’ve have killed me!”

Ben hands her back her cell. “Are you always _this_ theatrical?”

“It’s rude to lurk and spy on someone else’s messages.”

“I thought of offering to take some better shots of you.” He holds out his hand again. “You can send those instead.”

 _Oh_. “Okay, well—that’s nice of you.”

She discovers quickly that Ben’s got decent skills, and his images turn out _so_ much better than she’ll give him credit for. She bites her lip when she wonders. _Is this what the socials used to call as Instagram boyfriend?_ She looks at him from the corner of her eyes, observing the way he tilts his neck upwards to the sky as he enjoys soaking in the late morning sun. She’s bickering with him as usual, but her tongue feels dead as she absorbs the spectacle of him towering before her with his glorious hair and Ray-Ban shades. It’s clearly becoming more obvious that without _any_ kind of heels, she’s only coming up to his chin. He’s strangely becoming more… _tolerable_ too, and that’s just fucking her brain up.

And she hasn’t a clue what possesses her mind to do the next thing, but—

“Ben, come take a selfie with me.”

He faces her sharply, his expression unreadable behind his sunglasses, but she imagines he’s probably startled by her unexpected request.

“Umm, why?”

“Because, we’re roommates!” she chuckles uneasily. “And besides, don’t you know the golden selfie rule?” 

“No, but I’m guessing you’ll be telling me about it.”

“Always get the person with the longest arms to take the selfie.”

And she’s completely captivated when he breaks into a deep, husky laughter, his toothy grin appearing so charismatically boyish that she feels like she’s in a temporary paralysis. Why can’t she fucking function like a normal human being around him?

She’s being overly brazen, she knows that so well, but she manages to snap out of the trance and wave her arms at him. “Hurry it up, Solo. We’ll be moving on soon!”

It’s ridiculous because _she_ asked for this, and yet she’s still not prepared when he finally steps towards her, inching closer until their hips touch ever so lightly. He carefully takes the phone from her before extending his lengthy arm out, and in every possible sense, the golden rule is tremendously accurate, because the shot is _fantastic_ , getting most of the background within the frame which she’s surely incapable of achieving on her own—

But her heart palpitates uncontrollably, unable to tear her eyes away from staring at how seamless they look together in the photo.

As if they were perfectly made for each other.

Two pieces once separated, now coming together as one.

* * *

“Why _this_?” Rey asks Ben over a drink at the lounge. “For me, obviously it’s a given, but it’s not common that someone deliberately books a lone trip that’s thousands of miles away just to hop on a train.”

“Bucket list?” he suggests humorously, but when she’s not convinced, he sighs. “ _Fine_. My father was—well, _is—_ till this day, an avid traveller since he was young. He used to tell me outrageous and occasionally inappropriate stories about his exploits together with his best friend. In fact, he met my mother for the first time in a similar setting, but I think they were aboard a cruise instead.”

“Wow—” she mumbles. “A luxury cruise _and_ an expensive train excursion. You must be really rich, even without your job.”

He chuckles. “We’re comfortable.”

“ _Still_ , this seems a little intense..."

"You mean, for _me_?" he raises his eyebrows in mirth. "Go ahead, say it."

"Well, you don’t appear to be the spontaneous type. You like control over everything.”

“You saying I’m uptight?”

“Uh-huh.” And she cackles. “You’re a calculative schemer.” 

He shakes his head at her taunt. “Since I became a partner at my firm, I’ve not had much time for anything else.”

Rey can’t help herself; her curiosity refusing to be unheeded. “Not even dates?”

“There’s dates, and then there’s _meaningful_ dates. The former tends to be more common for me.”

“So…you’re not seeing anyone right now?”

“No.” There’s a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Happy?”

She quickly sips her drink to hide her discomfort. _Shit, shit, shit, why the fuck are you feeling relieved?_ " _Very_ happy. Spares everyone the trouble of getting to know what a grouch you really are." When he only laughs in response, her eyebrows crease inquisitively. “Don’t you wanna know if _I’m_ seeing anyone?”

“I already know you aren’t.”

“Excuse me?” she snaps. “Are you implying something?”

“Firstly, you’re on vacation by yourself. Secondly—” and his tone drops into a deep purr, “—you’re sleeping in my bed.”

“You gave me no choice!”

“You had choices, and you chose to stay with me. I’m ninety-nine percent sure things would’ve turned out differently if you are in a relationship.”

“Maybe I’m just an independent traveller who knows her boundaries and won’t hesitate to kick your ass if you try anything stupid.”

“Right. Then…call it a gut feel.”

“What if your guess was right about the guy I was messaging earlier?”

Ben dips his head to lean in closer, his eyes glaring right into hers with a provocative intensity that goes straight between her thighs. “Well, _is_ he?”

He’s a man that clearly wasn’t used to being wrong, adamantly ensuring he’ll win every battle in a war that he’s chosen to fight. Rey scowls, her sullen temper only serving to entertain him further as they wait for her to finally capitulate.

“No…”

He gives her rueful grin. “Sorry about that. I’ve been told I’m _quite_ a tormenter outside courtrooms as well.” After ordering another glass of whisky for himself, he shrugs. “Anyway—as I was saying, I think I’ve not thought about taking a vacation for—well, a _very_ long time, and flying far-off to isolate myself for a couple of days with some reading sounded idyllic to me.”

“Until _I_ crash-landed and messed it all up, huh?” she wiggles her eyebrows.

He glances down to his scotch, swirling it in his hand. “If you don’t mind, may I ask how old are you?”

She blinks. “You can’t guess?”

“I have a vague notion, but I was taught never to make assumptions on a lady’s age.”

“Smart move. I turned twenty-five in April.”

He actually swallows, his eyes narrowing. “ _Christ_ —you’re still incredibly young, aren’t you?”

“And you?”

“I’m thirty-five, Rey.”

Something delicious is twisting her insides again as she notices his darkened gaze, and she shamefully admits to herself that she’s never met a person she wanted to fuck more than Ben Solo. She’s not sure what’s driving this desire; whether it’s the fact that she’s becoming increasingly drawn to him, or if it’s the idea of him being so much older that gives her a nasty thrill of doing unbelievably naughty things with him.

It’s so, so, so _wickedly_ forbidden—

How would he feel like? What kind of noises does he make? Is he… _big_?

Rey’s imagination is already there with visions of him pounding into her, making her wet from his throaty moans. Or even allowing her tongue to taste every inch of that pale, expansive body she was presented with last night. She’ll certainly not forget his fingers... _those_ nonsensically large digits that’ll tease her all over before he’ll slide them between her lips so she can suck on them.

And maybe he’ll even whisper to her—

_Are you gonna be a good girl for me, Rey?_

_Oh fuck_. With the way her core clenches in response to that idea, she’ll definitely want to have him many, _many_ times. 

But they are just two strangers on a train, trying to figure out how to get from one place to the next. They already know from earlier exchanges that he’s on the west-coast, but given how busy he’s likely to be, coupled with his shared responsibilities in overlooking a very prominent law practice which has offices all over the country, he might as well be living on a different planet. She’s not under any make-believe that they’re even right for each other either. Not only have they established he’s obviously from a different world, but she’s also pretty much a nobody. He probably thinks nothing of her too. Just a youthful and amusing travel companion for the next few days.

And Rey comprehends herself well enough to know that she simply _can’t_ do a one-night thing.

Or even a couple of nights.

She’s been a wild child all her life, the girl that starts with the crumbs, but makes the climb to get the loaf. While she’s steadily built her endurance both physically and mentally, she’s never been able to guard her heart.

And she _understands_ —

Her emotions are far too raw, too untamed and Ben is just…something else. She already senses it awakening inside her, that yearning for him, and if she falls, she’ll be jumping in with everything she’s got. That’s just who she is, and maybe that’s not what he’s looking for, _if_ he’s even wanting anything at all. _You’ve never needed anyone for so long,_ she tells herself. _Why start again now?_

“Are you joining the dinner service tonight?” his voice breaks her thoughts. 

“Huh?”

“In the Platinum Club dining car.”

“Ah, right. Yeah, I will since I didn’t get to…yesterday,” and last night’s humiliation returns to haunt her when he smirks at her response.

Suddenly, her phone starts to buzz.

> **INCOMING VIDEO CALL**
> 
> Finn Isaac

She frowns. This is a little unusual, considering he’d usually drop a message if they needed to have a face-to-face chat. Within seconds, an old anxiety starts to come back to her, her mind churning with panic and anger.

Did something happen?

Is he in trouble?

“I’ll take this in the room,” she tells Ben. “I’ll see you back there in twenty minutes?”

“Sure.”

Her feet are light as she rushes back to their cabin, unlocking the door and throwing her bag onto the bed that’s been changed with fresh sheets. She jams in her earphones and dials him back. When his face appears on the screen, she immediately snaps. “Finn!” she hisses, “You asshole, don’t frighten the shit outta me like that!” 

“Hey, peanut…” his demeanour is sombre. “You doing okay?”

“I’m fine,” and she lowers her voice. “Are _you_ okay? What happened? You sound kinda… _weird_.”

“You alone?”

“Yes?”

“Maybe sit down, because I just need you to listen to what I’m about to tell you. You can ask all the questions later, but know that I might not have all the answers yet.”

She blinks, her bottom lip already trembling. “Is Rose okay? You’re scaring me.”

“I know, babe, I know. But understand that I love you and I’m glad we’ve got each other. You have me, yeah?” And he sighs before clearing his throat. “You sitting yet?”

Rey chooses to settle on the floor instead, crossing her legs. “Okay, what is it?” 

***

Rey strips off her clothes, folding it into a neat pile atop her bedside table before reaching into her tiny suitcase for the one dress she brought with her—a flowy chiffon material. It’s the only fancier outfit she’s bothered to pack for this trip. Suddenly, she hears the door to the cabin open and she pauses, one hand pressing the front of the fabric to her breasts while the other arm’s awkwardly angled as she reaches for the zipper behind her back.

She hears Ben's voice. “Uh, sorry. I didn’t…”

She turns to look at him, his massive frame covering the entire doorway. She squints at his hand, curiously filled with colourful snacks, most being assortments of chocolates and miniature packets of gummies. He’s already told her he doesn’t do _any_ kind of junk food, so he must have taken them for…

His eyes trail up her body until he reaches her face, and he takes a step back. “I’ll just go and—”

“Could you help me with this?” she asks before she can change her mind. 

There’s a brief silence, and she quickly faces away again, wondering if she’s made a mistake in pushing too far ahead of their comfort zones, and maybe she’s really _alone_ in this growing, unfamiliar sentiments between them—

But she hears the door shut, heavy footsteps crossing the cabin and the warmth of his body becomes evident against her skin that’s slightly exposed from her scapula down to the small curve of her lower back. He reaches to gently pull the zip upwards, his motions oddly slow, as if bidding his sweet time. She could have imagined it, but his fingers seemingly brush along her throughout this act, and when the zip reaches the top, there’s no doubt that he’s purposefully curling a palm around her clavicles, his thumb tracing softly at the slope of her neck.

“Are you alright?” he murmurs.

Rey tenses up. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Your eyes are red.”

When she stays silent, he turns her around, and her heart sinks further from how _stupidly_ gorgeous he is. It’s almost becoming painful to look at him under the evening glow. 

“You don’t have to tell me anything, but if you need them to bring your dinner here instead, I’ll ask—”

“Just stay here with me.”

Immediately, she regrets saying that, feeling that familiar apprehension of rejection and desertion from reaching out to people who won’t be there forever. _Once they know the real you, they won’t want you anymore and they’ll leave you behind,_ she tells herself. They all eventually do, don’t they? That’s why she’s been content with just Finn since they were teenagers. It took her awhile to get used to the idea of him dating, and when Rose came into the picture, it was hard at first because she didn’t want to get attached to someone who could walk out the door any time. However, it’s been surprisingly great so far, and Finn and Rose have been growing strong for six years now—

But not everyone is a Rose Tico.

Ben’s looking right at her, and whatever he must have seen on her face has led him to shift his hands from her shoulders to cup her cheeks. “Whatever you want, sweetheart. Anything you need— _anything_ at all. Tell me and I’ll sort it out.”

That completely destroys her, and she cries against his chest as he pulls her against him, one arm curled around her back while the other weaves into her hair to do slow, soothing circles. Her shoulders heave as she hiccups, her nose messy with snot and her cheeks staining.

A complete bawling mess of a petite human being.

And _yet_ , when she finally regains her composure, Ben’s still gazing at her as if she’s the only thing that exists in this world.

***

Rey curls on her side atop the bed, her knees to her chest with her head against the pillow. Ben’s sitting on the edge of the mattress, soundlessly observing her. She’s not sure what’s instigating her to tell Ben Solo—someone she barely knows—such revealing things about her childhood, but when she’s with him, she somehow loses all reasoning. 

“I wasn’t an easy kid to deal with in the foster system. Always getting into fights because I wanted to prove that I was the toughest one there despite my size. That behaviour stayed with me my whole life, but the social workers saw me as a problem. I must’ve moved through almost a dozen homes before I was placed together with Finn to stay with a man called Unkar Plutt." She sucks in a sharp breath. “He didn’t hit us or anything, but he was fucking shit in his own way. Always stingy with cash and gave us nothing but leftover crap on most days. He was a mean drunk too, but we were teenagers by then, so we knew our way around him. He was so removed from our well-being that he’d barely notice if we’re at school or if I ever limped home with blood all over my clothes.”

Ben’s voice is a quiet fury. “Why’d you get injured so often?” 

“Like I said…my impulsive temper grew as I grew, and there were days where Finn would’ve a rough time because some dumb kids would call him some really fucked-up names. Sometimes they’d be much bigger—much older, but that’s never stopped me.”

Ben sighs heavily, and she thinks he’s about to say something, but his fingers reach out to tuck a strand of stray hair behind her ears instead.

“When we turned eighteen, I had a massive fight with Unkar, and it must’ve been about something stupid because I can’t seem to remember what it was about anymore. He said some really nasty things, but so did I.” And her voice cracks as she continues, “I think my last words to him was that he was gonna die alone, and no one would give a fuck.”

“Hey, we all say things we don’t mean when we’re pissed. It doesn’t make you a bad person.” Ben’s tone strains a little. “I’ve said a lot of shit to my family, and I’m _quite_ sure some of them included the typical ‘I’ll be dancing on your grave’ lines.”

She chortles softly. “You don’t have to be _this_ nice to me.”

He furrows his eyebrows. “Err, it happens to be the truth. As I grew older, I became rebellious towards…one _particular_ individual. It’s been years since we last spoke, and it didn’t end on good terms either.” 

“What happened?”

He gives a wry smile. “Nothing, just some differences in opinion. In hindsight, it all seems rather trivial now.” He traces a knuckle along her forehead. “Tell me about you. What happened after the argument?”

Rey sniffs, growing fond of his unexpected tenderness. “We left for the city life a few months later, and after I got my scholarship, I hadn’t looked back since. Finn kept in touch with Unkar during the holiday season. He’s always been the better one, unlike me who’s never bothered.” And her lower lip starts trembling again. “But no matter what it is, Unkar took _both_ of us in at a challenging age, especially when it’s usually impossible to find someone who’ll willingly take in two teenagers. He gave me Finn—a brother who became a family that I never had, and I’ll _always_ owe him for that.”

Ben nods, and she becomes aware that he’s lightly resting a hand on her waist now, spanning almost her entire width.

“Finn’s on the way back to Unkar’s house right now to deal with the cops and medics. Apparently, they couldn’t get any details on a next of kin for him, but they found some old Christmas cards with Finn’s number written on them. They said he had a heart attack in the kitchen, and when he fell, he smacked his damn head on the counter and passed out before he…” and Rey screws her eyes shut. “He was basically on the fucking floor for a fucking week until his bloody neighbour was nosy enough to realise Unkar hadn’t come out to sit on the porch for ages.”

“I’m so sorry, Rey.”

Her throat hitches. “I waited too long. I should’ve tried—just let go of my damn ego and just try a _little_ harder. It’s not so difficult, is it? Just a stupid one-liner message every few months or scribbling my name in those pointless greeting cards that Finn sends. It wouldn’t change much, but at least he would’ve known that I didn’t mean what I said…”

There’s a gentle squeeze on her hipbone from Ben, and a comforting stretch of silence washes over them. She’s slowly being lulled to sleep from the feeling of his hefty palm caressing her waist and the intermittent brushes of his thumb swiping off the tears that trickle from the corner of her lids.

Finally, the bed dips a little from his weight as she hazily senses him hovering over her. “Why don’t you take some rest now, hmm?” he whispers, his breath tickling her ear.

“Don’t go…” she mumbles.

“I’ll just be a second,” and he draws away, but he halts when she grabs his wrist.

“Just until I fall asleep, then you can leave.”

And when he sits back down, she continues to hang on, knowing full well she’s coming off clingy and absurd because he’s got absolutely zero reasons to stay and deal with her shit—

But she’s beyond figuring that out now because she _needs_ him.

At least, just for tonight.

After that, they can go back to being just two people thrown into a situation where they’re forced to be amenable to one another. When he lifts his feet onto the mattress so he can shift her closer, she’s amazed when she inhales his shirt—

The heady fragrance she scented on last night’s bedsheets is coming from _him_. 

* * *

**DAY 3**

Rey sleeps through till the next morning. When she wakes, pale sunlight is streaming through the windows as the train continues to travel along an endless picturesque backdrop. She yawns, burrowing her face against the pillow before attempting to stretch out her arms and legs—

But she can’t move.

Her eyes flick down to see that Ben’s slung an arm over her, his fingers lacing through hers. Goosebumps across her body rise in exhilaration when she realises her back is pressed up against his chest, his soft snores muffled against her hair. She peers at his hand in hers, her skin feeling warm from how starkly huge his palm is, wholly surrounding her own. _Bloody bear paws_ , she thinks.

And she continues to stay there, adrift in a moment where they are the only ones to exist, curled up together in a space where time ceases to move forward—

But nothing lasts forever.

He starts to stir, his breath tickling her nape as he moves—and he must have grasped what had happened because his muscles stiffen, his hold on her hand starting to falter. Very slowly, she rolls around to face him, mesmerised by how flecks of green become more apparent in his umber irises under the light. 

“Hey…” and he pauses, considering her expression. “How're you feeling?”

“I’m okay. Sorry about…” and she fidgets uneasily. “I guess I just needed to let it out. I’ve never been able articulate what I was feeling for such a long time, and it feels… _good_ to finally do it.”

He’s already shaking his head. “Nothing to be sorry about.” 

“Thank you.”

“For?”

“For staying and making me feel less alone. You didn’t have to, but you did it anyway.”

And his voice comes out affectionately soft in his reply. “You’re not alone.”

Her pulse skips when she hears that, her eyes searching his face, feeling frustrated at herself for being so easily caught in his sweet nothings, when she knows it’ll probably mean more to her than to him—

But there’s something else in the tone of his speech—though _very_ subtle and easily missed, for a girl like Rey to have grown up knowing nothing of her parents and having no emotional connection to anyone until she met Finn well into her teenage years, it startles her when she recognises a similar nuance in his words.

“Neither are you,” she says.

And she slides a hand carefully towards him, unsure at first, but when her fingertips brush atop his, there’s an undeniable current passing through them, their eyes unable to look away from each other—

But it’s over just as quickly before she can interpret anything further. He gives her another small, indecipherable smile, and with both palms, he scoops up her hand and brings it to his mouth, pressing a gentle kiss.

He sits up. “Mind if I use the bathroom first?”

She blinks. “No…”

When he closes the door behind him, she props herself onto her elbows and furrows her eyebrows, listening to the shower turn on.

_What the fuck just happened?_

* * *

While it’s cloudy with a high chance of rain, there’s a town stop today.

They didn’t speak about that incident over breakfast, and Rey’s surprised at how easily it is for them to fall back into their usual routine without any awkwardness. It’s a strange thing, because while Ben’s pretty much the same, he’s _also_ somewhat different, as if—

—something has flourished between them that’s entirely unexpressed.

“My father would’ve loved this kind of rough, remote terrains,” he says to her as they wander around during the tour’s leisure time.

“You don't travel with him?”

“Nah, not since I was a kid.”

“Why?” and Rey begins to wonder if she’s being too pushy to get Ben to divulge such private details about his family life—

But _this_ already feels so natural, like they’ve known each other for years, and it’s not just been a few meagre days. And given that Ben doesn’t seem to mind… _maybe_ it’s not such wishful thinking after all. 

“I started boarding school very young, and my parents weren’t around much, so my maternal grandfather took care of me whenever I came home. His wife died from childbirth complications, so I was _really_ close to him growing up.” He hesitates, chewing the inside of his cheek. “In fact, _he_ was the reason I did law in the first place, but he passed before I even went to college. After that, I started spending time with some other relatives in my family during my summer breaks, and this went on till I graduated law school.”

She tilts her head. There’s something in his tone that tells her there’s more to it. “This family relation—is that the person you had a falling out with?”

He doesn’t answer immediately. “Mhmm.”

“Must be hard.” And she shrugs. “I personally wouldn’t know the feeling, but I’d imagine it’d be weird. To be so close to someone once, and then have that all taken away. I don’t know what I’d do if Finn and I were no longer talking.”

“Will it make you feel better if I say I don’t really think about it?”

“But do you still see this individual?”

“Not really.”

Rey knows she has no place in trying to put opinions on other people, but after last night, her instincts tell her that if she didn’t say this, she’d regret it for the rest of her life. “Ben—obviously I have no clue what went wrong, but I hope you won’t hate it when I say—” and she takes a deep breath. “Please _don’t_ be like me. Don’t wait until it’s too late. You won’t know it until it’s gone.”

She prepares for him to tell her to mind her own damn business. That she shouldn’t try and cross these invisible lines between them, as if this _—_ whatever _this_ is between them—already means so much more than what it is now. 

And yet, Ben surprisingly chooses to give her a smile. “No, I don’t hate it at all.” He stuffs his hands into his pockets. “Regardless, my entire family’s based in the east-coast—just like you, so I hardly see _any_ of them to begin with.”

“Do you miss them?”

“I try not to think about that either—” and he grins, “—but my mother demands monthly check-in calls, so she may continuously remind me of what a disappointing son I am for breaking her heart.” 

“Ah, but your father doesn’t…?”

“Oh no, nothing like that. If he isn’t out of the country doing fuck-all, he’ll join in the harassment too.”

Rey laughs hard at that, but when she finally catches her breath to gaze at him, there’s that _look_ in his eyes again. She can’t quite figure it out yet, but it’s too fleeting for her to inspect closer. She wonders if she’s _not_ being smart by deluding herself into having a sense of optimism. That _maybe_ there’s a small chance that he might feel something too. 

Ben checks his watch. “We’ve got about fifteen minutes left. I’m just gonna head to the pharmacy to get some shaving blades. Meet you back at the train?”

“Okay. I wanted to check out some souvenirs anyway.”

“Alright. See you later.”

***

As Rey walks out of the store with a bag of gifts for Finn and Rose, her mind’s still consumed with thoughts of _him_.

She’s _never_ felt this way about anyone, let alone a person she’s known for approximately seventy-two hours. Tonight is going to be their last night together before they go their separate ways. After they disembark the train, they’ll be heading straight for the airport with his flight back to the west-coast at noon while hers is an hour after, each heading in opposite directions. 

What is she expecting, really?

A convenience store catches her eye, and she goes in with the plan to buy some local snacks, but as she strolls around the shop, she comes across the prophylactics aisle.

She’s been on the pill since college because that was a conscious decision, so there was never any reason for her to check _these_ out. Her eyes sweep over the selections, her body almost frozen as she studies the different types, sizes and _flavours_ available. _What the hell is all of this crap?_ She wishes she paid more attention in sex-ed class back in high school. Or even to any of the _talk_ that girls have amongst themselves, because she’s always left it to her sexual partner’s good sense to manage this, so she’s got no fucking clue about _any_ of this shit.

And besides…

What is Ben’s size anyway? How the fuck is she going to know any of _this_?

It’s the sound of rain pattering on the windows that breaks Rey out of her daze. Against her better judgement, she decides to buy it as a joke, a humorous thank you gift to say ‘appreciate-you-for-not-kicking-me-out.’ She pays for a small box of standard condoms from some dubious-looking local brand and rushes out to prevent herself from combusting into a tiny pile of ashes.

By the time she gets back onto the train, she’s a little drenched, rainwater still dripping from her hair.

When she peeks into their cabin to see it empty, she casually ambles about the room, pushing her wet hair out of her face and plugging in her earphones to blast a song. She grudgingly arranges the stuff in her suitcase, knowing full well she’ll be at the mercy of Ben saying something snarky if anything is strewn across the floor. She scatters everything out, carefully sorting the fridge magnets, keychains and munchies.

She softly hums, “— _and I told you to be patient. And I told you to be fine. And I told you to be balanced. And I told you to be kind. And in the morning, I’ll be with you, but it will be a different kind_.”

After zipping up her luggage, she stretches her hand behind to reach for the condoms—

But it’s not there. She whirls around to see Ben standing over her. She hadn’t heard him enter the cabin, and she goes completely puce when she sees him examining the _item_ , his eyes squinting at the cartoon creatures resembling native wildlife printed all over the packaging. 

_Oh fuck, fuck, fuck—_

“What’s this?” he asks with a tinge of mirth when she yanks out her earphones.

“Err, it’s for you actually.”

“For _me_ ,” he echoes.

“Yeah, it’s meant to be like a…funny, small gesture to say thank you for letting me share your cabin. Y'know, with it being our last night as roommates and all…” and she blinks, noticing he’s staring at her with another incomprehensible look. She’s becoming nervous by the silence, quickly raising her hand. “Look, I’m not saying we should have…err, I mean this wasn’t me trying to…” and she tapers off, unable to form a coherent sentence without bursting into flames from utter humiliation.

What the bloody heck on God’s green earth made her think buying _that_ was a good idea?

“Rey—” and his gaze drops down. “Your top is…”

She becomes acutely aware of her surroundings. How both of them are fairly soaked from the rain, his wavy hair now floppy, his shirt sticking to his chest till she can make out the outline of those magnificent muscles again. And because of the downpour, her blouse has become translucent enough for her bra to show through. 

When she doesn’t make any effort to fix herself, he settles on clearing his throat. “Uhm—conveniently, I’ve bought for you something too.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rectangular object wrapped in brown paper.

“What is it?” she asks after several minutes, holding it between her fingers.

“You can open it now, if you want.”

After pulling back the wrapping, she stares at the intricate piece—a bookmark with a vintage metallic frame surrounding a delicately pressed flower at the centre of it.

“That flower only blooms in winter here, so we won’t get a chance to see it this time.” He tilts his head. “I know you said you don’t read much anymore, so I thought this may inspire you to pick it up again.” And he runs a hand through his hair. “Not sure if you’re the type that appreciates the feel of a physical book—or if you’ve moved on to eBooks, but I’m a _little_ old-fashion, if you haven’t already noticed.”

“Ben…” 

He shrugs. “You can think of it like a congratulatory present on your new job too."

It’s almost trancelike—the way she places his gift into her suitcase behind her and reaches out to the hem of his shirt, both fists bunching up the material as she tugs him towards her, watching how his eyes widen in surprise at her sudden attempts to close their distance. And she tiptoes, her neck craning forward to meet his ridiculous height till their lips touch.

The thing about unplanned kisses such as this, she’s prepared for it to be _awful_. Maybe their teeth will clack together, their tongues wouldn’t know how to move, or they’ll discover that they didn’t like each other as much as they thought they would—

But for Rey, Ben is pure ecstasy.

She trembles when his arms circle around her, pulling her into an embrace. He’s already responding, his lips soft against hers while his light stubble tickles her skin. He’s a fantasy himself, her senses becoming inebriated from his smell and the way he tastes, and her tongue starts to nudge at the seam of his mouth—

But her heart plummets to her stomach when he immediately pulls away, his palms closing around her wrists.

“I…” he starts to say. “I’m not sure if you understand what you’re doing.”

“ _What_ —”

“You don’t need to do this. You don’t… _owe_ me anything.”

Her temper starts to flare. “You think I’m returning you a _favour_ for letting me stay here?” When he stays silent, she wrenches her arms away from him. “This may come as a shock to you, but _nobody_ can make me do anything. And if I’m doing this, it means I…” but she can’t finish it, already the painful sense of rejection rising inside her.

“I just don’t want you to do anything you’re gonna regret. Whatever I’ve done, it’s not with any expectation of—”

She interrupts him angrily. “ _If_ you don’t want me, you can say so, Solo. Just don’t give me these bullshit excuses to insult me.” She’s already shaking, her throat catching as she mutters the next string of hateful words. “I’m not ignorant. My own parents didn’t want me, so why should _you_?” And while she promptly feels ashamed for saying such a manipulative line, knowing that Ben has _no_ obligation to her at all, something calamitous ensues between them, because he instantly snatches her waist and she’s confined within his arms again.

“Rey—sweetheart, that’s _not_ fair.”

She tries to wriggle away, but his grip on her is alarmingly strong. “I—I know, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said it.” She avoids looking at him. “I didn’t mean that…”

And there’s a deep fervour spreading throughout her body when he lifts her chin. His eyes have darkened again, his tone shifting to something primal. “I _want_ you. I think I’ve wanted you ever since you stood in the doorway and smiled at me like a little fool. I want you so badly that it fucking _hurts_ from just looking at you, but you _need_ to understand what this all means.”

She feels like she’s about to pass out from his newfound confession, but when her voice returns, she only manages to whisper, “I understand…”

“ _Do_ you?” and there’s a growing exasperation creeping onto him. “You probably think I don’t know you enough because it’s just been three fucking days, but I _do_. I know this will mean more to you than some passing fling.”

“What…” she’s barely audible. “Why are you doing this?”

“Because I feel it too.” He leans in to give her a gentle kiss and her toes start to curl. “What if I end up being someone you may never see again? I can’t kiss you, hold you or touch you whenever I want. I can’t always be there whenever you need me. Just a voice over the phone or a message on the screen.” His eyes sweep across her face, trying to discern if she’s starting to falter. “You’re okay with that?”

“I—I’m not okay—” and she’s trying to control the prickling sting behind her eyes, because she knows every word he says is true, only serving to remind them the grim reality of their situation, “—but it doesn’t negate my feelings for you.”

He’s looking apprehensive now. “I don’t have anything. I didn’t think that…” and when he sees her eyes shift to the bed where he’s placed the box with the colourful illustrations, he chuckles dryly. “That’s _not_ gonna fit me.”

She actually _gulps_.

He cups her face and kisses her again. “We don’t have to do anything. We can just—”

“I’m on the pill,” she says, her voice oddly small. “I’ve not been with anyone since my last check-up over a year ago.”

His body tenses up. “Right—well, I got tested a couple of months back, but I haven’t…I’ve never done it _without_ condoms before.”

“Neither have I.”

And she feels him slide a hand down to her waist, slowly pressing her tighter against him, until their groins touch and she’s able to feel how substantial he is _there_. When she thinks about what she’s already seen beneath those clothes, she now deduces how naïve she really is about a man’s body. She doesn’t have many encounters to compare it to (less than five, really), and they had been honestly…fine, or _adequate_ as Ben would probably correct her amateurish usage of adjectives.

“You have no idea. If you _knew_ just how much I’ve been thinking about…” He pauses to swallow. “I might not be able to stop at just _once_.” Every fibre in her body rises when he curls his other palm around her neck, his thumb stroking her throat. “As long as you know this, and you _still_ want it, then…”

Rey’s tiptoeing again to close the agonising distance between them—

But this time, it’s Ben who slips his tongue into her mouth.

***

She’s never been kissed like this before.

For a still moment, there’s just silence between them as his lips—probably the _softest_ lips she’s ever had, moves over her own, his tongue caressing and rolling around the insides of her mouth like he’s tasting her, savouring every bit that he takes.

And he takes, and takes, and takes. 

_There’ll be nothing left if you do_ , she thinks. _What will I have when you’re gone?_

He backs her towards the bed until she’s sitting on it and he’s hunching over, unwilling to break the kiss just yet. He’s _very_ good with his hands, constantly running all over her body, leaving a tingle everywhere he touches. For a brief moment, he moves back to look at her, noticing her hesitation blooming alongside her blush under the late afternoon sun that’s just broken through the rain clouds.

“I can undress first, if that’ll make you feel more comfortable.”

Ah yes, who could forget his no fucks given state of mind about the nakedness of his own body.

He doesn’t wait for her to answer, reaching for his tee from the back of his neck and tugging it off effortlessly in one hypnotising motion. Something aches between her legs as she takes in his brilliant physique, his deep-set eyes riveting her immobile as he slowly unbuckles and unzips his jeans, pulling it down his lengthy legs and allowing it to crumple on the carpet beside his shirt. And when she sees the shape of his growing hardness against his boxers—

Ben Solo is absolutely, without a doubt, the most perfectly attractive guy she’s ever been with.

“Your turn,” he murmurs.

He bends forward to capture her mouth again, his fingers proficiently unbuttoning her top and unhooking her bra. She fumbles to remove her skirt, barely out of it before he climbs atop the bed, arranging them to his liking as his lips brush against her nipples, his tongue flicking and laving against them until she’s writhing under him. He notices some of her old scars—those war wounds she wears with pride from days where she scuffled with the other kids over things that ranged from Finn to just wanting to fuck them up for being downright tools. He shakes his head and she’s a quivering mess when he kisses every single one of them, almost a poignant sense of tender protectiveness.

He continues to trail kisses along her figure, shifting downwards to hook his thumb under the elastic of her underwear as he pulls it off. “I thought it was just your face, but you have…” and he sounds completely fascinated. “There’s freckles _everywhere_. All over. Even in places I never thought…”

“ _Don’t_ —” she mumbles. “It’s the bane of my entire existence, really.”

He stifles a laugh as he parts her thighs. “You’re such a brave—such a strong, beautiful girl, Rey.” He plants a soft kiss to her centre. “I’m gonna make you just a little more wet, okay?”

She nods shyly, watching him bury his face between her legs. It happens so quickly she can barely process any of it happening. She falls back onto the mattress, her back arching as a delicious sensation flows throughout her body. He starts out slow at first, observing her every reaction like he’s analysing to see what works, but soon he’s lapping and sucking at her folds like a man on the brink of starvation. 

_Yes, there, more, please, everything_ —

When he finally draws back a little, he starts to add a finger to do a curving motion inside her, and she cries out. “ _Ben_ —that feels so—”

“Good?”

She nods most ardently, biting her lips as she whimpers against his thrusting digits.

He croons in a low, guttural timbre, “You have any idea how turned on I was the first time you said my name?” and he adds in a second finger while tracing his tongue around the outer skin of her opening. 

His fingers are so… _much_ , she can’t even describe it. Her body is pulsing, her nails scratching at the bedsheets from the intensity of the sensations he’s giving her. And his _voice—_ his stupid, deep, provocative tenor is just saying things that make her brain short-circuit. She feels like she’s on fire, a scorching emotion that’s threatening to burn everything in her path as he plants kisses along her thighs.

“And with you wearing those _ridiculous_ pyjamas too, I thought I was gonna die with the worst case of blue balls in my _entire_ life.”

“It—” she’s wheezing from the excessive sensory overload. “It’s my _only_ cute matching pair!”

She’s sopping by the time he removes his fingers, her own wetness coating her entrance. Her breath hitches when his hand swipes over her fluids, slathering it all over his palm, and after discarding his boxers, her eyes widen as she watches him use her slick as a lubricant substance for himself down _there_.

And _there_ is…

Wow.

He settles himself between her legs, gripping behind her knees as he spreads her further than she ever thought she could go. He rests his forehead against hers, his eyes heavy with arousal as the head of his erection starts to rub against her throbbing cunt. “We can still… _stop_ ,” his voice coming out far more composed than he looks. “It won’t change the way I feel about you, baby. I promise.”

Her vision’s equally cloudy when she listens to his sweet assurances, and maybe it’s in the way he called her _baby_ for the first time that obliterates the last of her rationale, because she’s unable to restrain herself from canting her hips, causing more than the tip of him to slip inside her. There’s a sharp intake of breath and his neck twists to the side, his eyes screwed shut like he’s about to fall off the edge. 

“It’s too late…” her tone’s shaky as she smiles at him, pulling him down for a kiss.

And that must have been enough for him, because Ben begins to slowly push in, and Rey’s in wonder by how easily her insides welcome him. Drawing him deeper within her most intimate spaces like he’s always been an extension of her. Just from his mere _size_ …or even the feeling of just skin on skin and the beads of sweat beginning to form across their bodies as they tangle up in each other. 

_This_ , she thinks. _This is how it’s supposed to be. The way it’s always meant to feel._

When he _finally_ wedges all the way into a depth she never knew existed within her, they moan into each other's mouths. Her back curves on the bed while she becomes increasingly conscious of their erratic breathing, louder than it’s ever been as it resounds throughout the room, no longer drowned out by the low rumblings of the train cruising across the tracks. 

He glances at her, his gaze languorous. “Can— _may_ I come inside you?”

Yes. Please. She wants that. She _needs_ that.

She gives him a breathless nod, and his lips fall on hers again, one arm beneath her shoulders while the other intertwines through her fingers before moving in a firm, desperate rhythm that causes Rey to lose all senses. Her entire world shrinks down to just him while she's distantly aware that one of them is groaning—the other is panting—

Both deliciously filthy and out of control.

* * *

Rey is beyond amazed, questioning how her body has gone through life for so long without knowing Ben’s. It’s warm, intoxicating and staggeringly delectable when they melt into each other, and he tastes and smells like the closest thing she’ll ever have to unadulterated rapture.

She also thinks she may have been a cat in another life, because her tongue constantly needs to trail all over his preposterously enormous body—even in places that’ll usually fluster her. But when she watches his pupils enlarge, ogling at her in such a predacious manner whenever she’s tasting him everywhere—

It’s fucking worth it.

And Ben definitely _knows_ how to fuck.

Her toes haven’t stopped impulsively curling since the first time they kissed. It’s unbelievable how easily he achieves in curating such longing in her just through sex. The way his deep, dreamy thrusts is able to feel both indecent and intimate at the same time as he makes love to her. Or even in the manner his considerable frame wholly cocoons her, which naturally she should feel trapped, but he somehow makes her feel both revered and sheltered instead.

And when her name escapes his lips while emptying himself inside of her, his voice rough and raspy, she never wants it to end.

He likes _staring_ at her in the bedroom too; the expressions on her face when it’s all scrunched up in pleasure, the way her lips part when she cries out and when she’s unravelling as he brings her to another orgasm, but like the shameless idiot he is, he doesn’t hesitate to growl in her ears to confirm her suspicions in the midst of their fourth time—

“Love watching you, baby, especially while you’re coming on my cock.”

 _Oh_.

Oh…

She won’t even _attempt_ to make sense of what she goes through when his head’s in between her thighs, or she’ll burst into flames and be annihilated in a fabulous death. 

She remembers the time he pinned her down into the mattress, nipping at her neck while giving shallow, playful strokes against her cunt and breathing lewd words into her skin, which _always_ does the trick to set her ablaze again. But after sinking her down onto him, he actually gasped out—

“You’re such a good girl, _aren’t_ you, sweetheart?” and his hands gripped her hips to rock her up and down his length. “So good to allow me to fuck you like _this_ —to let me even fuck you _at all_ —”

She had never reached her climax _so_ incredibly quick in her life, shamefully concluding there’s a first time for everything.

And this carries on till there’s nothing left between them, but just sweat and slick glazing their skin, his cum trickling down to smear her thighs and he’s gently mouthing her all over, refusing to allow her crimson flush to fade. She won’t tell him, because she doesn’t want to add to his already inflated sense of self-importance, but the way his hair gets all mussed up and sticks out in various corners after each round—

Yes, that truly does _something_ to her sanity.

Surprisingly, while he’s probably tried every kind of foreplay on her, he’s only willing to do two positions; vanilla missionary and when she straddles him to be on top. Although, once she becomes bold enough to ask why he doesn’t want to take her from behind—

“I like to see your face and be able to kiss you whenever I want. Anything else significantly reduces that capability.”

Ah. _Okay_. That’s…

“ _Why_?” he sings in a teasing, melodic tone.

“Nothing?” but she’s already getting flustered. “I just thought that—”

And it’s like he already knows her so well, every reaction and every thought in her head, because he chuckles while kissing her embarrassment away. “Not when I already have so little time left with you.” He leans in till his lips are at her ears. “And I’m _quite_ sure I won’t last very long in other positions. Gotta make every one of them count.”

Oof.

He _really_ does have a way with words. When she met him, she figured he’s a man who knows exactly what to say. His quick flippancy or witty remarks tells her he’ll talk himself out of anything. Surely, he’d know how to persuasively sweet talk too?

It’s becoming harder to tell. He’s so different now. So much more…affectionate. She adores it, and while she’s not someone who typically needs a man’s validation of her worth, she can’t deny that he treats her like she’s _everything_ to him.

And it’s not just about the sex, because it’s also how she feels about everything else. From the way he continuously gets her water to stay hydrated, to pulling on his clothes and telling her to stay in bed while he’ll grab some dinner back to the room for them. It’s easy—almost _too_ easy, how she’s able to talk to him about anything, and how he knows so much about her from just the littlest things she tells him. Despite all her faults and fears, he wants her anyway, cooing to her over and over again how perfect she is. They fit so snugly under the covers too, just like pieces of a puzzle being put together, and she feels serene as his nose brushes against her nape when he nuzzles into her hair.

She woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, and when she crawls back beside him, his arms naturally pull her in, his face inhaling the scent between her breasts. She watches him sleep for a while, her eyes drinking in and tracing every curve, every beauty mark and every outline as her fingers tuck back some of his dark waves that frame his cheeks. 

It’s a nice feeling.

 _Very_ nice—one that she could frighteningly become used to, and that would be _bad_.

Bad, bad, bad.

Because tomorrow they have their own flights to journey back home, and despite him making her feel like she’s the only girl in the world in the last couple of hours, it doesn’t change the fact that they’ll _still_ be heading to differing ends of the country.

And to Rey, that’s essentially someone leaving.

Again.

* * *

**DAY 4**

They decided not to have breakfast in the room for their last day, and after packing their bags, Rey’s sitting with Ben in the Platinum Club dining car for the first time. They’ve ordered coffee, cereal and various assortment of bread rolls, and while normally Rey has a voracious appetite, she’s simply propped her jaw on her fist, gazing out the window.

“You’re quiet,” he says to her, scooping some cereal into his mouth.

“Mmm…” she responds, her eyes staring off into the early morning horizon, but she faces him when he takes her hand, his immense fingers lightly clasp around hers.

“What’s on your mind?” he asks.

 _Thinking how we’re probably never going to see each other again_ , she exhales softly. _And even if we do, how long must I wait each time before I get to have you? Must it drag on till we realise enough is enough, and you’ll walk out the door like others before you?_

It’s not his fault, she knows it. If anything, it’s her own for allowing herself to succumb to this, knowing how it’ll end. She’s not going to throw a tantrum and be resentful, because he’s made her no promises. He told her what the stakes are before they fell into that reverie. He knew it. She knew it. He’d tried to warn her up till the very last second.

And yet, it doesn’t hurt any less—

But there’s something different about Ben Solo that makes her want to find out just how far she can push her boundaries. To see how much she can endure so she may have him in her life— _if_ he truly does feel the same way like he’s told her.

She manages a small smile. “Just thinking how the weather looks good today.”

He frowns, unconvinced. “Tell me what you want, hmm?” and his thumb gently brushes atop her knuckle.

“Nothing I don’t already have,” she jokes before meeting his eyes. “And you? What do _you_ want?”

“Me?” and he slants his head, his lips curling in his usual, smug fashion. “I want _many_ things, but for now, I’ll be happy if you’ll give me your number and share that photo of us.”

* * *

It doesn’t get easier.

After checking-in their suitcases and passing through security, he’s achingly sweet, lacing their fingers together as they walk, wrapping his arms around her so he can prop his chin atop her head to make silly comments about her height and dragging her to the bookstore to show her his favourite novels since he was a kid.

She won’t tell him she’s already missing him, and that it’s only becoming worse.

His flight is the first to leave, and she fights back every instinct in her body that demands her to cry. She awkwardly smiles as he towers over her, not willing to join the queue that’s forming in front of his gate—

But just before he speaks, she beats him to it. “Let’s not make a bigger deal out of this than it already is.”

His mouth opens, closes, and opens again. “…okay?”

“We have each other’s cell. You know where I work. I know where you work. It’s not like we’re never going to speak ever again.” And she takes a steady suspire before returning his gaze. “So, can you just kiss me one more time before you go and say ‘I’ll be seeing you’?”

His eyes narrow, his lips pursing for a second before he sighs. He draws her into an embrace, gently tilting her chin up, but he doesn’t kiss her mouth like she thought he would. Instead, he brushes his lips on the centre of her forehead, trailing down to press them on both apples of her cheeks and the tip of her nose. He angles her to the side so he can kiss her temple, continuing soft kisses down her jawline before moving to the other side of her face to do the same.

And only then, does he _finally_ kiss her mouth.

“Call me when you land,” he murmurs against her lips.

Her skin is a vibrant reddish hue when he lets her go, slinging the strap of his duffle bag over his shoulder. She watches him walk to the counter for Business Class passengers, and within seconds, after turning around one last time to look at her, he disappears from her sights.

Like he was a beautiful dream that never really existed.

* * *

**2 WEEKS LATER**

Ben shuffles a stack of papers into a file before craning his neck to check if his secretary is still at her desk. When he catches her eye, he raises his hand and motions for her to come into his office. 

Bazine Netal pops her head through the door. “Yes, Mister Solo?”

“Can you get these to Hux first thing tomorrow morning?” he lifts the folder.

“Sure thing,” and after she takes the documents from him, she coughs. “Well—since I’m here, Mister Snoke was looking for you this afternoon. Something about some fund-raising dinner that he needs you to attend on the company’s behalf with a group of our clients from the chemical segment.”

“Uh-huh. Okay, I’ll give him a call later.”

“Oh—” Bazine’s tone bordered bewilderment.

“What?”

“No, nothing. Normally you’d blast into an extensive speech about how these events are a waste of time, and you hate being a monkey in a suit for hours while eating ridiculous portions of food, as you’ll _always_ need to get takeaway after because you’re still starving.”

Ben quirks an eyebrow. “Those thoughts are _still_ relevant, but I figured I’ll cut you a break from listening to my sermon today.”

“Interesting…”

“I’m probably gonna regret asking this, but _how_ so?”

“Dunno, you seem less—” and she grins, “— _cranky_. You finally getting laid?”

Ben’s nostrils flare in irritation. “Excuse me? I hardly think my sex life should be an appropriate topic of discussion.”

“Oh, _please_. You’re everyone’s favourite bachelor and the best lunch subject in this company— _so_ popular that even the branches in other states talk about you too.” She frowns at him. “You mean, you didn’t know?”

“I…had no idea.”

She laughs, shaking her head sympathetically. “Anything else I can help you with today? If not, I’ll probably head off.”

“Nope, that’s it. Thanks, Bazine.”

“It’s past eight, so you should leave too. Goodnight, Mister Solo.”

After she closes the door, Ben runs a hand through his hair before opening the top buttons of his shirt and loosening his tie. He picks up his phone, noting that his long-time wallpaper—which was a rather lengthy quote from one of his favourite philosophers—has now been replaced with Rey’s selfie. His thumb slides over the screen to halt atop her face, staring at her doe-eyes and pretty smile.

He brings up her chatbox, scrolling through the last few messages from earlier today.

_She does_ , Ben thinks.

In fact, she’s not going to be in the country for at least another two weeks because she’s gone to Europe for a Summit as one of the key speakers to address the attendees this year.

Ben knows that ever since she watched him pack his suitcase on the morning of the last day, she locked herself down into a fierce self-preservation mode. He senses she’s afraid, unsure of how long he’ll continue being this way to her. Always living with a fear at the back of her mind that he’s going to grow tired of her and walk away.

And it’s not going to matter what he says or does from hereon when he’s still miles away, because it’s _never_ going to be enough for her to completely surrender again like she once did for those amazing, otherworldly hours where she allowed him to explore every inch of her. Where he watched her laugh, smile, tell him every little hidden secret and every battle she’s ever fought since she was a little girl—

But more importantly, it’s where she looked at him like he’s her entire world, and he felt his worth as a _man_ , not as the sole heir to the Skywalker-Organa legacy.

He leans back firmly into his chair, the backrest reclining so he can fold his arms behind his head as he stares blankly at the ceiling, his mind a swirling vortex of emotions.

Something’s changed in him. It wasn’t just from how he feels about her—because lately he’s been thinking more about old memories he’s locked away in the dusty corners of his mind. He won’t deny that he’s just beginning to realise how much of an impact she's had on him.

He remains still for several minutes before opening up his email and begins typing. 

> From: Benjamin Solo [benjamin.solo@pdslaw.com]
> 
> To: Alexander Snoke [alexander.snoke@pdslaw.com]
> 
> **Subject: Transfer opportunities to east-coast offices**
> 
> _Dear sir,_
> 
> _As per the subject above, very keen to explore this._
> 
> _Happy to give you a call about this tomorrow, among other things._
> 
> _Warm regards,_
> 
> _Ben Solo_

Snoke wasn’t going to be happy about this inquiry. He’s always demanded Ben to be at the headquarters with him together with the rest of their key management. Ben taps his fingers on the edge of his desk before saving the email to draft. There’s just _one_ more thing he’ll need to do before he sends that out.

As he locks up his office, his phone vibrates with a message that shows him the only reason he’ll ever need. 

* * *

While he was a rather optimistic and care-free boy during his youth, Luke Skywalker has now become infamous for being an incorrigible curmudgeon. A no-nonsense character who has a penchant for theoretical approaches, most of the associates tend to shy away when they see him storming through the office—with the exception of three rather boisterous senior associates who have no qualms about having a banter or two with the irritable lead attorney.

Voe, Tai and Hennix formed a heart-warming camaraderie since they were young law students, entering into the Skywalker Kenobi and Organa law practice under the same batch, and annoying the shit out of Luke is one of their favourite pastimes.

“Sooooooo…” Hennix hums from the doorway of Luke’s office. “Boss, I heard a new girl’s joining today?”

Luke grunts.

“Fresh meat!” Tai shouts. “Is she hot?”

“Fuck sake, Tai. Are you so underdeveloped that your blood only flows to one _specific_ organ in your body?” Voe sneers. “Didn’t you read the circulations? She’s joining as Luke’s new associate.”

“How old?” Hennix asks.

“A quarter of a century,” Luke mumbles.

“So _young_ too!” Tai hoots.

“She’s sharp,” Luke snaps. “Far more intelligent than you lot, I can tell you that. She’s a scholarship holder and her undergrad thesis is remarkable, referencing many of Leia’s works, which _by the way_ she’s read every single publication done by my sister, so she understands our approach very well. You haven’t even completed at least ten of them!”

“Aw...” Tai groans. “Kick in the nuts, boss. Told you I’d be up to speed by Christmas!”

“This Christmas?” Voe mocks. “Or five Christmases from now?” 

“Tai, maybe if your stuff was half as good as your talking, you’d be the one for the job, but here we are having another debate about the endless probabilities instead,” Luke huffs. “Now, get back to work. _All_ of you.”

Voe and Hennix snorts out laughing, and after Tai flips the bird to them, he shrugs at Luke. “You sure it’s a good idea to hire someone _that_ smart again? Did you forget what happened to the last guy who—”

“Leave. My. Office. _Now_!”

After the three of them scamper out of the room, Luke’s landline rings. He pinches his nose bridge and picks up the receiver. “What is it, Tree?”

Theresa “Tree” Pio—who has been Luke’s secretary since he joined his family’s company decades ago—remains bubbly as ever on the other line. “Good morning, Mister Skywalker. I have two things on the immediate agenda for you. Is now a convenient time?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“No!” Tree laughs. “Unfortunately, you don’t. Please do not forget you have your new hire coming in today around eleven, therefore by my precise calculations, after going through the necessary HR paperwork, Miss Ridley will be in your office for the briefing by eleven-thirty.”

“Fantastic. What’s the other one?”

“You have a call waiting.”

“Who is—” Luke starts to ask, but Tree has already transferred the line. _Fucking hell_ , he swears under his breath. He absolutely hates it whenever Tree hangs up before he’s finished talking. He coughs before clearing his throat. “This is Luke Skywalker speaking.”

Silence.

He frowns, deciding to try one more time. “Anyone there?”

“Hello—” a low baritone voice finally responds. “It’s been awhile, Uncle.”

* * *

Rey rubs her temples as she sits outside Luke’s office.

She’s pulled up her locks into a unique combination of three small hair buns and she’s wearing brand new pieces of clothing from head to toe. She eyes the whistling lady sitting behind the desk in front of the door. Theresa (or preferably known as ‘Tree’ as she strongly insists) is a tall, chirpy woman with gorgeous, golden hair that gleams under the sunlight.

She glances at the four large portraits on the wall. She recognises three of them immediately; one of them being the beautiful, formidable Leia Organa, the other being the seasoned Luke Skywalker, while substantially younger, still retains his boyish cerulean eyes, and the third being a man called Ben Kenobi, whose name has been immortalised in history with a renowned human rights law named after him.

She’s not familiar with the fourth individual—a rather tall man with broad shoulders, whose very handsome face and stunning wavy brown hair starkly contrasted against his stern appearance. She squints at the tiny name plaque placed at the bottom of the frame.

> **ANAKIN SKYWALKER**
> 
> _Founder, father and teacher_

_This must be Luke and Leia’s father_ , Rey realises, her attention completely hypnotised by Anakin’s commanding aura. He must have been _quite_ an extraordinary individual at his peak.

“Miss Ridley?” Tree’s voice interrupts her thoughts. “He’s ready for you now.”

***

Something weird is going on.

As she sits there across from Luke, listening to him talk about the structure of the organisation and a couple of basic need-to-know, he didn’t seem to be the same despondent individual she met during her interview. She can’t tell at first, because most of his crucial facial expressions are buried behind a grey shaggy beard, but there’s no doubt there’s a twinkle in his eyes that wasn’t there before.

Luke seems almost…

 _Elated_.

He finally stops to consider her. “Any questions?”

“No, I’m good!” she smiles. “Just really excited to finally start working with you and contributing back to society. I’ve always been really passionate about helping other people, especially those who don’t have the means to do it on their own.”

He nods. “All in good time, and don’t worry about the other imbeciles around this office, because if _any_ of them were even remotely better than you, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

“Thanks Luke.” And she nibbles her lower lip. “Truthfully, I’m just a little anxious about replacing the last guy who worked for you. I’ve heard some really… _outstanding_ things about him.” She sucks in a sharp breath. “The task seems a little daunting.” 

He leans back in his chair. “Life’s real funny, I’ll give you that.”

Rey blinks. “How do you mean?”

“Well, I guess since you’re replacing him…” and Luke rubs his neck for a minute, trying to gather his thoughts. “The person you’re talking about is my nephew—and yes, I suppose you could say he’s brighter than most. Always questioning everything. Always wanting to push the boundaries of things that I never felt was necessary. And even though we had very different views in handling matters, he’s always been somewhat…naturally _gifted_.” Luke seems almost regretful as he continues, “He left this company to pursue corporate law instead. I was a little hot-headed back then. Many heated words were exchanged, and while he’s always been a bit of a jackass himself, I should’ve understood him and his motivation to make that decision.”

“And…what was that?”

“His grandfather,” Luke sighs. “Anakin Skywalker wasn’t always with this company throughout his career. He left midway to work for a retired judge; a highly unscrupulous man known as Sheev Palpatine. You would be familiar with that name, surely? My father assisted Palpatine in the nascent stages of setting up a law practice which has now gone on to become known as Palpatine Dooku and Snoke. Along with expanding Palpatine’s organisation, Anakin became one of the best corporate defence attorneys in the last few decades. Trained dozens of next generation associates too. While I don’t know what made my father finally decide to leave, the damage was already done between Kenobi and him. My sister never really spoke to him again either.”

Her body has gone stiff, her brain attempting to piece together subtle fragments of information.

Could it be…?

“He wanted to forge his own path away from the family, just like Anakin did.” Luke scrubs his face lightly with a palm. “It shouldn’t have been a surprise when he joined that very same company. Knowing who took care of him as a kid? Benjamin was very attached to his grandfather, even after he died.”

“This—” Rey’s tongue felt dead in her mouth. “This is your sister’s son? Leia’s son?”

“Uh-huh.”

“And Leia’s husband’s name is… _Solo_?”

“Yes, _Han_ Solo to be more precise. You know Benjamin?”

“Uhm…I think so.”

“Huh. Small world. Interestingly, I hadn’t spoken to him since he walked out of this office five years ago—until _today_. Not sure what aligned the damn stars, but that idiot decided to ring me up this morning and…” Luke links his hands together, staring at the ceiling. “He’s always been a strange boy, muttering about how the primary reason he’s reached out is _only_ due to some chance encounter with a girl during his recent vacation.” And Luke actually _chuckles_ fondly. “Well—whatever the hell the reason is, I feel like a weight’s been lifted off my chest, y'know?”

Her pulse is fluttering by now. “Why?”

“Because he’s making arrangements to move back to this city to be closer to us. Han and Leia are going to be over the fucking moon when they find out.”

She's lost in wonder when Luke stands up to open the door. “Tree! Where’s that bottle of scotch I’ve been saving? Time to crack that open!”

“Sure thing, Mister Skywalker. What’s the occasion?”

“Celebrating my new associate, of course.” He takes a deep breath before he roars in a deafening jubilance that’ll most certainly resonate across the entire office floor—

“And my absolute fool of a nephew is finally coming _home_!”

* * *

**SATURDAY**

Rey’s sitting in the coffee joint they agreed on, her eyes staring off into the distance as she daydreams. She remembers Finn and Rose teasing her about her date with Ben today, now labelling her little vacation journey as a ‘lovecation’ instead.

_“Why didn’t you tell me?”_ she had asked him over the phone after her first day. _“I must’ve looked like such a fucking idiot whenever I talked about them, not having a clue I was really talking about your own family.”_

 _“Rey…”_

_“You weren’t sure you could trust me? Is that it?”_

He didn’t answer straightaway, but when he finally did, her exasperation almost immediately dissolves under his soothing tone. _“It wasn’t on purpose. I haven’t talked about my family for ages, so I just don’t usually tell people about them. Nevertheless, the truth—the real truth is that I wanted you to see me. Just me, without all my family’s embellishments and the weight behind my grandfather’s legacy. The last thing I needed was another person compelled to treat me differently because of who I am. You should do it because you wanted to. Because you felt it too. And that despite everything, what we have between us, is real. I needed you to see that on your own.”_

The door of the café opens and her eyes flick up to see Ben making his way over, slowly sliding into the chair opposite her. When he reaches over the table to hold her hand, her heart soars beyond her wildest dreams, attempting to make sense that someone has truly come all this way to be here.

He’s come _just_ for her.

Maybe everything is really going to be _okay_. Everything will work out, because it’s _him_ , and ever since they met, he’s always been making her feel like they are an exception to the rule.

He’s here.

He’s _really_ here.

And he returns her smile, brushing a kiss on her fingers before saying, “Hey, sweetheart.”

* * *

Maybe I know, somewhere  
Deep in my soul  
That love never lasts  
And we've got to find other ways  
To make it alone  
But keep a straight face

And I've always lived like this  
Keeping a comfortable distance  
And up until now  
I had sworn to myself that I'm content  
With loneliness

Because none of it was ever worth the risk

But darling, you are the only exception

And I'm on my way to believing

**—Excerpts from "The Only Exception" by Paramore**

**Author's Note:**

> I’m so sorry that this one-shot turned out to be a whopper, it just grew so much! I do hope I was able to reach one of you emotionally. Or if you shed a tear 🥺 Because I did. Or am I truly alone in this galaxy? LOL xoxo
> 
> As always, if you’ve enjoyed this, do leave some love! Your feedback, thoughts and comments on this fic will be extremely adored and cherished 💙
> 
> My [Twitter](http://twitter.com/pocketsofdaisy) 🦋
> 
> Other fics:  
> [The Girl in Terminal B](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8319814/chapters/19053589) (this gorgeous masterpiece highly inspired me to write this fic)
> 
> Sources:  
> [Platinum Service](http://journeybeyondrail.com.au/guest-information/service-levels/platinum-service/) (references for inspiration)  
> [Skinny Love by Birdy](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNzCDt2eidg) — this is the cover song Rey hums, but the original is — [Skinny Love by Bon Iver](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssdgFoHLwnk)  
> [Jannah](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Jannah)  
> [Dopheld Mitaka](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Dopheld_Mitaka)  
> [Sheev Palpatine](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Darth_Sidious)  
> [Count Dooku](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Dooku)  
> [Amilyn Holdo](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Amilyn_Holdo)  
> [Gial Ackbar](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Gial_Ackbar)  
> [Anakin Skywalker](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Anakin_Skywalker)  
> [Obi-Wan Kenobi](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Obi-Wan_Kenobi)  
> [Organa Family](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/House_of_Organa)  
> [Temmin Wexley](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Temmin_Wexley)  
> [Kazuda Xiono](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Kazuda_Xiono)  
> [Unkar Plutt](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Unkar_Plutt)  
> [Bazine Netal](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Bazine_Netal)  
> [Voe](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Voe)  
> [Tai](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Tai)  
> [Hennix](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Hennix)  
> [C-3PO](http://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/C-3PO)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic] but darling, you are the only exception](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28555617) by [utlaginn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/utlaginn/pseuds/utlaginn)




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